I’m on my third cup of coffee but I still feel tired probably cause I was up till 3:30 alternating between reading Frank O’Hara poems and watching really weird porn. Also I had a terrible dream that one of my best friends died and I woke up crying and then spent a good 30 minutes stalking her on Facebook to make sure she was okay/alive instead of calling her because I’m so anxious and awkward and sad (join the club). Life is weird right now. Nothing is happening and everything is happening. I miss things and I’m drinking too much and wanting too much and I’m failing at keeping my priorities and promises to myself. My diet lately has consisted of mostly rice krispies, 1% milk, coffee, and toast. I need more substance and also I need to be more grateful.

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